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2006-02-23 14:40
�1. Curling!
It
is Aftonbladet, where they use iso-latin-1-IPA and non-rhotic
Engleesh, appearantly:
S� funkar: ['k�:liN]
How works: ['k�:liN]
The Zwedish laydees may be in the final, but you shouldn't assume that
their countrypersons have much of a clue what they're up to.
�2. Foopball
It
is the Foopball World Cup! In the dawn of time, the Earth lay
in the heavens like a foopball, and Lord Ganesha looked upon it and
found it good. And he ordered that a cup be made in its likeness, and
a ball be made in its likeness also, and that the cup should be
awarded to the victor of a mighty foopball competition with the ball.
He then added, by no means petulantly, foto's of teh event were sacred
only to him and that their were many taboos on their distribution and
you'd better respect them or there'll be trouble. And so it came to
pass:
FIFA has banned publication of World Cup photos through the Internet,
including on thousands of newspaper web sites, during matches and has
severely limited the number that can be published, regardless of time
limits. It has also introduced editorial restrictions on how
photographs can be used in print publications.
�3. Top Trumps - International Statesman Edition!
It is Otto von
Bismarck-Prettyhouse!
Personally, Bismarck was a brilliant entertainer who greatly
appreciated funny stories and wordplay. He was fluent in several
foreign languages, and a perfect diplomat of excellent manners and
politeness. His friends were chosen independently of origin, creed, or
political beliefs, with the exclusion of socialists and social
democrats whom he despised. Bismarck loved good food and drink and had
a tendency to use both excessively. His most important tool in
politics was his talent to successfully plan complex international
developments.
(The whole page is iffily translated from the Cherman, which makes it
even more delightful than it might otherwise have been.)
In other news, did you know that the American War of Southern
Incivility during a period when Queen Victoria's grief over the death
of her husband and consort had made her very sanity questionable and
that ministers basically neglected to mention it to her? The 19th
century, Varied Reader - it is completely barking mad!
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2006-02-23 13:39
Ponsonby? Ponsonby!
The Irish people had always resented the coldness of the Royal Family
towards Ireland and had complained that their sovereign had not set
foot in Ireland since 1861. They quite overlooked the fact that there
had been occurrences which were calculated to implant in Her Majesty's
mind a distrust and even a dislike of Ireland. The first was that
when the Prince Consort died the Queen presented a statue of him to
the city of Dublin, but the Mayor and Corporation of the refused to
accept it and sent it back. This occurred when she was in such deep
grief that it completely overshadowed her life, and she is said to
have reported that she would never forgive Ireland.
p.62, Recollections of three (3) reigns, Sir Frederick Ponsonby
And that's opening it at random. We have coveted this such book ever
since its cameo in "Swirving" Erving Goffman's Presentation of self
in everyday life and now we have a copy of our own. Thanks, Oxfam
bookshop!
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2006-02-23 10:23
�1. �ntligen!
�ntligen!
�ntligen guld f�r Anja P�rson.
- Jag k�nde hur jag nj�t innan jag kastade mig ut i andra, sade hon
gl�djestr�lande.
Antlers!
Golden antlers for Anja P�rson.
"Now the other reindeers will let me join in their many reindeer
games", she said, her nose aglow with joy.
�2. Belgium, man! Belgium, woman!
Hilarious
consequences!
What else could you get when a right-liberal Fleming man and a
left-socialist Walloon woman, both MPs, fall in lurrve?
Way back in 1912 the Socialist MP for the Francophone city of
Charleroi, Jules Destree, summed up the mood when he declared: "In
Belgium there are Walloons and Flems. There aren't any Belgians."
Ridiculous! Are we not all, in a sense, Belgian? We know we
are!
P�criaux [the lady of the case] is equally surprised by the
furore. "We are living a true love story and the child which will be
born from our union is a common project," she told Lib�ration. "He is
a man, I am a woman, he is Belgian, as am I. Isn't that normal?"
No, it isn't:
Barely 1% of all Belgian marriages take place between members of the
two communities.
Why are the two (2) parts of Belgium still together? Well, there's
the monarchy - as Holy Roman Emperor we know a bit about the role of
monarchies as symbol of unity in an ethnically inhomogeneous kingdom,
and don't think we don't - and there's Bruxxels. Bruxxels is the
capital of the Universe, or at least Yoorp, and its nominally
bilingual status does nothing to hide the fact it is actually a
Francophone enclave in Flanders and nobody can face the custody
battles.
�3. Hildegard Hammerschmidt-Hummel investigates!
And when Hildegard Hammerschmidt-Hummel investigates something it
stays investigated, for sure!
This week: Of Bards and Busts.
A bust of Shakespeare has been promoted from an act of posthumous
randomness to a true likeness:
Forensic imaging techniques and medical studies comparing the
so-called Davenant bust in the Garrick Club with a 17th-century death
mask of the writer has convinced a German professor, Hildegard
Hammerschmidt-Hummel, that the bust was made in the early 17th
century, when the playwright was still alive, and not the 18th.
Hoorah for Hildegard Hammerschmidt-Hummel!
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2006-02-22 16:22
We hear from time to time rumours, which we are disinclined to
altogether discount, that Blighty is a more hospitable land than many
in Yoorp for not-especially-white-skinned immigrants. We also hear,
in more particular, that some Somalians have come to Blighty after
unproductive stints in Nederland.
What we know for sure is that the kebapshop next door but one (the
other side of the pub) has a A4 home-printed notice on the wall saying
"Please do not ask for credit as refusel [sic] often offends". The
"refusel" used to say "refused" and has been corrected in biro. Also
written on the notice in biro are the Frenchy-French "Pas de credit,
SVP" and the Dutchy-Dutch "Geen lening, alstublieft".
The staff and clientale (except us) look slightly Somalian to our
admittedly inexpert eye, and they sell a Somalian something dish whose
name we forget, and the cans of nasty fizz have Arabic labels and
old-fashioned pull-off ring-pulls.
And the kebaps are very delicious.
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2006-02-22 14:11
It is - quite
literally - the usual story:
Britons and the Irish are bottom of the European league for speaking a
second language, a new EC survey says. Sixty-six percent of
respondents from Ireland and 62% from the UK admitted not knowing any
language other than their mother tongue. This compared with 42%
across the EU and 1% in top-scoring Luxembourg.
The thing about this, is we thought we remembered a story not very
long ago that had the Hungroonians bottom. So we followed the
Beeboid's
link and we found that it was just so. In the classice report
"EB63.4 Europeans and languages" (09/05) it is cheerfully asserted
that:
Half of the citizens of the Member States assert that they can speak
at least one other language than their mother tongue at the level of
being able to have a conversation.
and the list of shame is:
IE 41%
ES 36%
PT 36%
UK 30%
HU 29%
While the new report, the future classic "EB64.3 Europeans and
their languages" (02/06) (our emphasis) gives for as far as
we can see exactly the same question the shamings of the following
namings:
ES 44%
HU 42%
PT 42%
IT 41%
UK 38%
IE 34%
From which we, for one, conclude that the sampling is pretty FUBAR and
can we have some error-bars next time please?
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2006-02-22 09:49
Chick chick chick chick chicken,
Grow a little tooth for me!
Chick chick chick chick chicken,
Grow teeth like snakes and me!
I haven't had a bite since Tuesday
And now it's half-past three,
SO
Chick chick chick chick chicken,
Grow a little tooth for me!
It
is Etienne Geoffroy Saint-Hillaire, founder of
comparative anatomy!
In the early 19th century, Saint-Hillaire observed that developing
parrots have tiny bumps on their beaks that resemble teeth, something
he ascribed to modern animals deriving from more basic primitive
forms. But due to his developing battles with Georges Cuvier over
evolution, the finding was forgotten until Harris, a graduate student,
re-discovered it nearly 200 years later.
Who Harris you ask or enquire? Matthew Harris!
Working late in the developmental biology lab one night, Matthew
Harris of the University of Wisconsin noticed that the beak of a
mutant chicken embryo he was examining had fallen off. Upon closer
examination, he found that the snubbed beak of the mutant chicken had
tiny bumps and protuberances along the edge of its beak that looked
like teeth, alligator teeth to be specific. The accidental discovery
revealed that chickens retain the ability to grow teeth, even though
birds lost this feature long ago.
The back of the evolutionary sofa, the things you find down it!
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2006-02-21 17:02
We were looking for a cheap edition of Bagehot (pronounced
"Badge-ot", boobytrap fans!) and there's only the Oxford Classics,
which isn't cheap enough.
Would someone kindly found a Cheapskate's Political Libry along the
lines of the Wordsworth Classics range and whack 'em out for less than
a pint of delicious Engleesh beer each, puh-lease?
Thanks very!
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2006-02-21 14:38
It
is polyglotty, an obscure condition affecting the vocal tract, an
it is spreading like wildfire!
Les Europ�ens sont de plus en plus polyglottes, selon le dernier
sondage Eurobarom�tres qui atteste que 56% d'entre eux peuvent tenir
une conversation dans une autre langue que leur langue maternelle, un
pourcentage en hausse de 9 points en cinq ans.
The Europeans are increasingly polyglottes, according to a survey
Eurobarom�tres which attests that 56% of them can hold a conversation
in another langwidge other than their native tongue, a rise of 9% in
five (5) years.
Blockade the ports! Ground the planes! If we don't act fast and act
decisively this bizarre form of so-called "throat flu" could soon
sweep Blighty and then where would we be, eh?
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2006-02-21 11:13
It
is delicious semla buns, the traditional Zwedish pre-Lent treat,
and their season is upon us, for some values of "us"!
We are marrying into a carnival-free branch of Dutchness so
indulgence in seasonal patissery is set to remain the highlight of our
late-winter hijinks, but frankly we think we'll stick with delicious
pancakes since they are very delicious and we don't need a recipe for
them.
What do they do where you are or come from, Varied Reader, to mark the
Gras of passing Mardis?
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2006-02-20 16:52
We're doing two (2) courses, one of which involves pretending to know
Cherman, which we don't, and the other of which involves posting an
essay on Wednesday (to be sure of arriving Friday) which involves
writing and printing it by Tuesday night, which is tomorrow.
Oh dear oh dear.
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2006-02-20 14:42
It
is Erwan Lec�ur, directeur scientifique de l'Observatoire du
d�bat public!
Vous analysez, au sein de l'Observatoire du d�bat public, les
repr�sentations sociales des Fran�ais. Quelle est celle qui domine ces
cinq derni�res ann�es ?
You analyse in the bosom of the Observatory of Public D�bate, the
social repr�sentations of the French. What is it which dominates the
last five (5) years?
We want for our birthday an Observatory of Public D�bate, which will
be a Laboratory in the Imperial University (Faculty of Stuff). In
fact, we might even appoint ourself to be its directeur
scientific as well as its patron.
Unrelatedly, which is the funnier 19th-century state, Prussia or
Austria/Austria-Hungary? We currently lean towards Prussia, ourself.
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2006-02-20 10:39
�1. H�las!
We are certainly very devastated that Janne "The Manne" Ahonen wasn't
even on the podium in the men's longhillhoppning. We missed it all,
though, on account of being vair vair delayed on our way back from an
Open University Cherman tutorial in Taunton. (There's only one (1)
Cherman group for the whole south-west of Eng-ger-lnd from Swindon to
Cheltenham to Cornwall, so there were many Epic Journeys made that
day. We shudder to think what happens at level 2, which this isn't.)
�2. Seen from abroad
It
is the wimmins's 1000m Ice Woosh, as reported in Bildbladet!
Anni Friesingers (29) Gold-Traum �ber die 1000 Meter ist
geplatzt. Bronze auf ihrer Spezialstrecke, �ber die sie in dieser
Saison noch kein Rennen verloren hatte. Gold ging an die Holl�nderin
Marianne Timmer, Silber an Cindy Klassen aus Kanada.
Anni Friesinger's (29) Gold-Dream for the 1000 metres is
geplatz. Bronze auf her Specialstrecke over which she
was previously undefeated this season. Gold went to the Dutchwimmin
Marianne Timmer, silver to Cindy Klassen of Kanananada.
(Cf the dutch
coverage)
�3. Technically not 'Lympicks, but
A very fat cat.
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