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2005-12-22 12:19
�1. For shame, Nederland!
It
is a silly immigration test!
Would-be immigrants hoping for Dutch citizenship will need to pass a
special test on Dutch language and culture, the country's parliament
has ruled.
What's that, Varied Reader? No, sillyhead, they don't mean
white would-be immigrants!
Some 14,000 applicants, mainly from Turkey, Morocco and Surinam, are
expected to sit the test each year.
�2. Oh noh, it's a camauro!
It's
Benny!
WHEN Pope Benedict XVI arrived in the popemobile for his weekly
audience in St Peter's Square, onlookers could have been forgiven for
thinking Santa Claus was in town.
To keep warm against the bitter cold, the pontiff wore a red velvet
cap, trimmed with white fur which, together with his scarlet cape,
gave him the look of Father Christmas.
The traditional hat, known as a camauro, was commonly worn by popes in
the medieval period to keep their heads warm on cold days and it
featured on many paintings at the time, but it has rarely been worn in
modern times.
That's his story and he's sticking to it. (He just realised Santa had
better poll numbers and is trying to muscle in on his turf. Camauro,
indeed!)
�3. Still the
Manne
Janne Ahonen kan titulera sig Finlands b�sta idrottare anno
2005. V�rldscupsuver�nen vann omr�stningen i stor stil f�re Tanja
Poutiainen och Tommi Evil�. F�r Champions League-segraren Sami Hyypi�
blev det bara en fj�rde plats.
Janne "The Manne" Ahonen is Finlands athlete of the year. 'Nuff said.
(We hadn't heard of the others anyway.)
�4. God jul och gott nytt �r till alla!
May all your trees be twinkly, and we'll be back when we're back -
we're not sure they have Internets in Derbyshire, where we're going
shortly.
[Permalink]
2005-12-22 10:49
It is the
BBC World Service and especially its eastern European services:
The Slovak section of the BBC World Service has fallen silent after 66
years on air - the first of eight European language sections to do
so.
Hello Slovakia! This is London calling! You're on your own now.
[Permalink]
2005-12-21 17:24
So I nipped down, having an appointment, to the Bristle register
office to get them to start the process of certifying me as being
unimpedimented in the marrying of my belov�d in Abroad.
The three(3)-week delay turns out to be due to what amounts to posting
of the many banns so that persons can, should they wish to and they
better hadn't, object.
Then we need to get that such stifficut, the reproduction one that
claims we were born to human parents that we keep in our sock drawer
(which is indeed an odd place to keep human parents, ho ho) and get
them all apostillated, book the town hall, arrange the party,
and we'll be all set to say "Ja!" (which is all they mostly do in
Abroad, apparently).
[Permalink]
2005-12-21 12:58
It
is Bildbladet's christmasalbumsfeature and it alerts us (in an
irritating pop-up window) to Banaroo - you will surely remember their
gold-selling "Dubi Dam Dam"? - and their delightful "Christmas World"
long-player.
We are reliably informed that the ballad "Coming Home For
Christmas" is particularly good.
[Permalink]
2005-12-21 11:33
It is Max
"Chuckles" Weber and it is especially an Englishing of a review in the
Germanbladet [Is That] Die Zeit? of a large new biography of
said scintillating sociological scamp.
To sum up Radkau roughly, Weber's first phase, leading up to his
psycho-physical breakdown in 1898/99 which it took him years to
recover from (at his own request he was finally relieved of teaching
duties in 1903), is obsessively determined by his sexually
unfulfilled, allegedly unconsummated marriage with Marianne Weber, by
his impotence, and by his masochistic tendencies. Attendant to these
are Weber's continual pollutions, or nocturnal ejaculations, which he
saw as extremely detrimental to his creative powers.
(We shudder to contemplate what the Googlebots will think, but after
all we no longer have access to searchs in our many logs.)
[Permalink]
2005-12-20 14:13
�1. Things you never thought you'd miss
It
is the rebellion against the renewal of the FDR's "Patriot" Act
"We need to be more vigilant," agreed Senator John Sununu, a
Republican from New Hampshire, where the state motto is Live Free or
Die. He quoted Benjamin Franklin: "Those that would give up essential
liberty in pursuit of a little temporary security deserve neither
liberty nor security."
There was a time when every second wingnut on Usenet made that their
constant refrain. Bush's political legacy will surely be that he
outed so many Shmibertarians as big fans of torture and scapping
habeas corpus. (Tax is still bad, of course.)
�2. What you say?
Dieven
hebben op het Britse eiland Wight een babypingu�n gestolen.
They've stolen a baby pingu�n! The cads!
Return the babypingu�n at once or your in deep trouble, silly thieves.
�3. Twinkletree Travesties
Tenk hvis du lot de tradisjonelle kulene hvile p� loftet i �r og heller
pyntet juletreet i fargene til fotballaget i ditt hjerte.
Are you an idiot or an oaf? Then why not deface your nice tree with
random foopball-themed tat?
Stay away from Liseberg, G�teborg, Gothenburg, Zweden - they've had an
outbreak of design�rs attack their nice Twinkletrees. It is very sad.
[Permalink]
2005-12-20 10:34
'D Riddance, says
us:
Antonio Fazio resigned on Monday as governor of the Bank of Italy,
finally succumbing to the mounting pressure of a banking scandal that
has severely damaged the reputation of the country's business
community.
A brief recap, sir or madam?
Mr Fazio had resisted calls for his resignation since the summer when
court documents highlighted the close relationship which he and his
wife had with Gianpiero Fiorani, a banker involved in a controversial
takeover battle [for an Italian bank. The rival suitor was ABN Amro,
and Italian banks do not get taken over by foreigners -DvB]. The calls
reached fever pitch last week after Mr Fiorani was arrested on charges
of running a criminal network for personal gain and market abuse
related to the takeover battle.
Italy, eh?
[Permalink]
2005-12-19 16:55
We know what you're wondering or musing Varied Reader, but the answer
is mostly no:
Finskspr�kiga jultomtar finns det gott om. Men att f� tag p� en
svenskspr�kig tomte i huvudstadsregionen �r som att hoppas p� en vit
jul i Kenya - n�st intill om�jligt.
There are plenty of Finnish-speaking Christmas-santas. But getting
hold of a Swedish-speaking Christmas-santa in the Helsingrad region is
like hoping for a white Christmas in Kenya - almost impossible.
We, for one, bet there's sn�
on Kenya mountain; will that do?
[Permalink]
2005-12-19 13:13
Ho ho oh no! It
is the patriarchs of the Greek Orthodox church and they're worried
about the dangerously low levels of Jesium in today's Twinkletree
knick-knacks:
-Bilder med sn� och renar inneh�ller inget julbudskap. De b�r
f�rest�lla Kristi f�delse, s�ger �rkebiskop Christodoulos i en
predikan i grekisk tv.
"Pictures of the Baby Jesus and angels have nothing to do with
Twinkletree. They should have reindeers and flying sleighs. Ho ho
ho!", said archbishop Sossageodouloupouloupos in a rant on Byzantine
TV.
Our thoughts exackly, archbishop!
[Permalink]
2005-12-19 10:13
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
wie gr�n sind deine Bl�tter!
Du gr�nst nicht nur zur Sommerszeit,
nein auch im Winter, wenn es schneit
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
wie gr�n sind deine Bl�tter!
Oh Twinkletree, oh Twinkletree,
You're tasty fried in batter!
You groan not much in Somerset
Nine buttons and a chair you bet
Oh Twinkletree, oh Twinkletree,
You're tasty fried in batter!
(These Chermans are crazy, for sure.)
Die Deutschen lieben ihren Weihnachtsbaum. Deshalb haben immer mehr
einen zweiten - im Garten, auf dem Balkon oder im
Kinderzimmer. "In diesem Jahr sollen
etwa 25 Millionen Christb�ume verkauft werden, etwas mehr als im
Vorjahr", sagt Jens Stengert von der Schutzgemeinschaft Deutscher
Wald (SDW).
Ja ja, we are all especially at this time of year about the
Twinkletrees completely crazy! "Mmmm... trees!", said Jenny Stonegoat
of the Cherman Forest Somethingsociety.
We have a Tannenbaum, a kerstboom, a julegran, a juletr� and a
Twinkletree this year. They are very nice.
[Permalink]
2005-12-17 15:22
"Yes! Yes!"
European leaders have agreed the next seven-year EU budget after two days of tense talks ended in the early hours.
The UK gives up 10.5bn euros (�7bn) of its rebate, some 20%, while the budget grows to 862.4bn euros, helping to fund the development of new member states.
We want the rebate dead, with a side-order of CAP reform, so this is fine by us.
Polish Prime Minister Kazimierz Marcinkiewicz, whose country will get 4bn euros more aid than the UK had at first proposed, punched the air and shouted "Yes! Yes!" when the deal was done.
(Props, also, to Ms Merkel for allegedly engineering the Franco-British compromise. We suspect we're going to get on other than spectacularly well with her future agenda, but she does seem to be a bit good at politics and we like it when persons are good at things.)
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